Value Perception

As a jewel of gold in a swine's snout, so is a fair woman which is without discretion. (Proverbs 11:22)

I saw this verse in my quiet time and thought to share a few thoughts on the same.

Imagine a pig with a jeweled gold ring on its snout. It looks beautiful. Or does it? How would you feel taking it for a walk?  Does it give a fashion statement with that gold ring?

That is what beauty is to a woman without discretion. Outward beauty is but an addition to the person that is represented by the rest of her person. I will give us another passage containing the same truth from another dimension.

Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price. (1Peter 3: 3, 4)

Sadly, we live in an age that places a great premium on that gold ring on the snout. And it goes without say that we are reaping the dividends of those values we hold. When we price a woman using her visible, we should not be shocked when we see that gold ring immersed in the sewer as she scavenges for food because the kind of food her body craves can only be found on dumpsites.

Let us get back to our verse. We have a beautiful woman, discretion and a gold ring on a pig’s snout. As absurd as it looks, a beautiful woman lacking discretion is just like that pig.

But then what is discretion? I know someone is asking.

At the very basic, discretion is her ability to accurately value self and therefore walk according to the value she possesses. And that is where the gold ring comes in. A woman having discretion values her whole person above her looks. She therefore will seek to develop and add value to that more than she does the visible her. It goes without say that such a woman will develop the spiritual her continuously as that is what determines who she is as Proverbs 4: 23 says.

Think about a degree certificate. It is a piece of paper whose significance is tied to the person who earned it and the institution it came from. If I stole a blank certificate from the university and inserted my name on it, probably nobody may be able to discover that it was fake. But would it mean that I have the degree printed on that paper? I might be able to get my way in many places because of that piece of paper. But I certainly will be unable to do what a legitimate holder of that degree can do in the field it denotes. Chances are that unless I use that degree for purposes other than the training it indicates I will eventually be found out as the paper will not be consistent with the training it indicates.

We talk about class. And that is one place the ring on a snout is most pronounced. Ever encountered someone speaking with a fake foreign accent? Someone travels abroad for a week and comes back with a foreign accent. Or someone goes for a meeting in a big hotel and all of a sudden has to carry bottled water everywhere with the hotel branded bottle. Maybe they happen to be in a meeting with some influential person and will do all in their power to ensure they take a picture with them that will be made the desktop of all the gadgets they own. And we have the woman who applies three coats of paint to make her face flawless and youthful. Not mentioning the ones who insert implants to make bums and boobs more visible.

Many times these are evidences of the ring on that snout. Someone attaches so little value to themselves that they will look for anything to make them feel a little better and hopefully more valuable. Sadly, instead of adding value it proves the person a fake, eventually lowering the actual value of the person.

It becomes worse because the person feels that people do not seem to notice or appreciate the effort they have taken to add value to their person without realizing that they have done absolutely nothing toward it as they have only painted a worthless thing using more visible (or expensive) colors since nothing on the inside has changed.

Of course they will become more desperate as they feel the need to get a little appreciation for all that effort in the wrong direction. They must get attention at all costs.

The reason many girls give for wearing those micro skirts is that nobody notices or appreciates them when they dress decently. They want to be told that they are sexy or look nice and will do anything to hear that.

Do you notice that snout and lack of discretion? Why should someone need others to know that they are good unless they have nothing on the inside and must show everything they have and are? They therefore will flaunt all their wares so that anyone can show the slightest attention.

But it goes beyond being noticed. Someone so inclined will prostrate to anyone who shows the slightest appreciation. That is the reason someone will jump to bed with the first person with the unlock key, ‘I love you’, irrespective of whether it is a joke or out of politeness. Then they will shout that all men are beasts or all women are players when they get bitten.

What is the purpose of dress? What does the Bible mean when it talks about modest dressing? What does modesty mean?

The basic purpose of dress is covering nakedness. That is what we see from Genesis.

Modesty is therefore restraining its purpose there. We dress to cover nakedness. Adding other purposes to it brings in another dimension. Modesty in dress is the kind of dressing that does not draw attention to the wearer. A person dressed modestly is therefore the person whose dress points away from their body and to something or somebody else.

The Bible also talks of the attire of a harlot whose purpose is directly opposite to modesty. A harlot dresses to draw attention to her body, especially the sensuous parts so that she can entice and arouse lust in her beholders. Her dress therefore accentuates those parts of the body that will point any onlooker to easily available (and of course desirable) sex. Incidentally it is the same with male prostitutes. You will therefore not need to see an advertisement of prostitution services. You will just need to walk by her place to know that she is available for sex just by her dressing.

Passing through the street near her corner; and he went the way to her house, In the twilight, in the evening, in the black and dark night: And, behold, there met him a woman with the attire of an harlot, and subtil of heart. (Proverbs 7: 8 –10)

That was how Tamar was able to have Judah sleep with her. She simply dressed the part so that Judah had no reason to suspect she was someone other than a prostitute.

Many times that is what our sisters are saying with their dressing. And that is what the lack of discretion indicates. No wonder it is compared with a pig ornamented to kill with a gold ring. This is because we are sending spurious or conflicting signals to whoever looks at us.

I see girls and women walking to church and can just but weep inwardly because their dressing points people opposite the church. And you will hear them complaining that men are not noticing them when looking for wives. How do you dress like a harlot and expect to be treated like an honorable woman?

I found an interesting quote on social media. It says that the amount of flesh a girl shows is inversely proportional to what she has to offer.  In non mathematical terms, the more a girl shows the less she has to offer. Which is the reason their fare in life consists in a broken relationship after another as nobody expects anything more than the flesh on display; and flesh has no chance of offering any long term gratification.

You see, wife material girls and women are modest in their dress. They are not temptations to the brothers because then the men will run farthest from them when they need a wife. The weaker ones will simply take the easily (and many times readily) available sex but reserve their search for a wife elsewhere.

But discretion indicates something else. Many people will change to get something. Many youth will get saved and be committed to church when they want to get married. Again that is the presence of that gold ring on the snout.

Someone develops themselves for the simple reason that they want to grow. What they get after the development is an overflow from that growth.

But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you. (Matthew 6:33)

Someone increases their chances for marriage when they focus elsewhere. They do not pray with one eye open as they look for available opportunities. To them a search for God is more than adequate to focus on. Then God Himself will make them irresistible.

One thing have I desired of the LORD, that will I seek after; that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, to behold the beauty of the LORD, and to enquire in his temple. (Psalm 27:4)

Beholding God’s beauty continually will transfer some of that beauty to the beholder as was with Moses. Seeking God for God will give Him an opportunity to use you to show off His glory in you. Using God for your purposes lowers God to a servant and denies Him the chance to fully demonstrate what He is able to accomplish once given the chance.

As an aside have you ever heard of an unattractive millionaire? What about an ugly songbird or a shapeless philanthropist?

Their attractiveness originates from elsewhere because beauty alone is not sufficient to meet any human need. What someone is and has therefore shifts the focus from the outside to other useful attributes. Simply speaking we cannot eat a plate of beauty when we are hungry.

Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised. (Proverbs 31:30)

This explains why men will leave all these beautiful girls and get a wife who did not seem interested in men and marriage because she had kept herself hidden in her environment, culture or whatever.

But there is one place discretion holds maximum water; the spiritual realm.

Thus saith the LORD, Let not the wise man glory in his wisdom, neither let the mighty man glory in his might, let not the rich man glory in his riches: But let him that glorieth glory in this, that he understandeth and knoweth me, that I am the LORD which exercise lovingkindness, judgment, and righteousness, in the earth: for in these things I delight, saith the LORD. (Jeremiah 9: 23, 24)

This is what gives unfading beauty all over as the Bible consistently teaches. In fact, instead of such beauty fading with age, it tends to become the more evergreen with the passing of time. One becomes increasingly beautiful as they get connected to heaven. Sample this

Having your conversation honest among the Gentiles: that, whereas they speak against you as evildoers, they may by your good works, which they shall behold, glorify God in the day of visitation. (1Peter 2:12)

Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives; While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear. Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price. For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands: Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement. (1Peter 3: 1 - 6)

For I say unto you, That except your righteousness shall exceed the righteousness of the scribes and Pharisees, ye shall in no case enter into the kingdom of heaven. (Matthew 5:20)

I dare say that it is impossible to seek alignment with heaven and fail to obtain the favor of men. But it is important to realize that the focus is not on the here and now but on the eternal. And we focus on the spiritual by devoting more time seeking what God wants of us and with us through His word and prayer as opposed to social media and all the other media that will shift our attention earthward.

Blessed is the man that walketh not in the counsel of the ungodly, nor standeth in the way of sinners, nor sitteth in the seat of the scornful. But his delight is in the law of the LORD; and in his law doth he meditate day and night. And he shall be like a tree planted by the rivers of water, that bringeth forth his fruit in his season; his leaf also shall not wither; and whatsoever he doeth shall prosper. The ungodly are not so: but are like the chaff which the wind driveth away. Therefore the ungodly shall not stand in the judgment, nor sinners in the congregation of the righteous. For the LORD knoweth the way of the righteous: but the way of the ungodly shall perish. (Psalm 1)