Complete Repentance

As far as the east is from the west, so far hath he removed our transgressions from us. (Psalm 103:12)

I know we love that verse to bits. But do we realize that God does not excise the sins from us? Do we realize that He does not forcefully take them from us? He removes what we have released to Him.

We have a responsibility to release our sins for Him to take them so far from us. We must be willing to forsake them for this verse to have any significance to us. We might sing it all we can but He will NEVER take any sins that we have not forsaken anywhere leave alone that far.

I am reminded of this lady who was given a lift in a pickup. She was very grateful as she was going some distance and her load was heavy. She boarded but didn’t remove the load from her back or sit. When the driver asked why she was not putting her burden down she countered that she was grateful that the vehicle had agreed to carry her. But she didn’t want to burden it further with her load.

Many times we are like that lady. We want to enjoy the rewards of forgiveness without releasing the clingings of the sin.

We are happy when we are taught that grace is free. What we do not want to accept is that it is not cheap. It cost Christ so much suffering and death. I will equate this with people who when invited for a meal they are not paying for will stuff themselves to indigestion without realizing that while it was free to them it cost the host much.

As ministers we are supported by God’s people yet I see ministers living their lives as if the support they receive was spilled on the ground for them to waste or was worthless to the supporter. Free does not mean worthless. It just means that the cost was borne by somebody else.

If I regard iniquity in my heart, the Lord will not hear me: (Psalm 66:18)

How willing am I to make a clean break from my sins? What do I think about my pet sins?

On my blog I have a post about the cost of disobedience. One person asked me to give my take on delayed obedience and I reflected on that for some time. Delayed obedience is the rebellion of a coward. You see a coward is scared of punishment and will do anything to escape it. A coward will do whatever it takes, including another sin to avoid being punished for the first sin.

The coward is as obedient as will defer punishment. A coward will never have a change of heart, unless to make people think it is so for a particular purpose. And no wonder God is also fed up with them.

So then because thou art lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I will spue thee out of my mouth. (Revelation 3:16)

There is more hope for the openly rebellious than for the coward because the coward shifts like the desert sands to avoid what may inflict pain, and repentance inflicts pain.

And yet for all this her treacherous sister Judah hath not turned unto me with her whole heart, but feignedly, saith the LORD. And the LORD said unto me, The backsliding Israel hath justified herself more than treacherous Judah. (Jeremiah 3: 10, 11)

Note this also.

But the fearful (cowards), and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death. (Revelation 21:8)

That is how God feels about cowards. They begin the list of those headed to hell.

What does that have to do with transgressions? Many times we want to appear repentant when we have not faced our sins squarely especially with the purpose of forsaking them. We may be in a continual state of repentance, even living a life so full of tears that we may appear saintly when people look at us. Yet that may be a consequence of being afraid to face the consequences of our sins. That is the running theme of the book ‘The Scarlet Letter’. Look at David.

When I kept silence, my bones waxed old through my roaring (groaning) all the day long. For day and night thy hand was heavy upon me: my moisture is turned into the drought of summer. I acknowledged my sin unto thee, and mine iniquity have I not hid. I said, I will confess my transgressions unto the LORD; and thou forgavest the iniquity of my sin. (Psalm 32: 3 - 5)

I tend to think that between the time David sinned and was confronted there was so much repentance. He may have appeared the epitome of righteousness, even holiness but he was the opposite. If David was anything similar to me he spent days and months repenting and repenting and repenting, yet he was not willing to forsake the sin. You see he was living with Uriah’s wife. However religiously legal it was, he knew that it was sin before God. Yet he was not willing to let go of the sweet enjoyments that proceeded from the sin. His must have been a perpetual cry of repentance from dawn to dusk. I am sure that even sleeping was a pain as he slept beside the ‘sin’ night after night.

His bones waxed old because he was being torn between confessing his sins and forsaking them. He wanted to be forgiven yet he was not willing to let the sin go. He was like this lady on a lift.

When he was finally able to face the sin it became very easy to find his release as God was ready to forgive. Even the relationship that was the cause of the struggle was dealt with quite easily. And that is what God is telling us this day.

Come now, and let us reason together, saith the LORD: though your sins be as scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they be red like crimson, they shall be as wool. If ye be willing and obedient, ye shall eat the good of the land: But if ye refuse and rebel, ye shall be devoured with the sword: for the mouth of the LORD hath spoken it. (Isaiah 1: 18 – 20)

The main issue is not our sin. It is the forgiveness. Though God is ready to forgive, He can only forgive what we have forsaken. We can’t tell Him to take the sins from us when we have a thread connecting us to them unless we want him to tear us apart like was happening to David. He delights to forgive. He is ready to forgive. BUT HE WILL FORGIVE US ON HIS TERMS. He will not forgive us to make us feel good. He will not forgive us to make us feel free. Though forgiveness releases good things to us, we should treat them as the fruit of the forgiveness instead of the goal. We are forgiven because we have sinned, not so that we can receive peace. It is forgiveness after complete repentance that releases peace.

Bring forth therefore fruits meet for repentance: {meet...: or, answerable to amendment of life} (Matthew 3:8)

Bring forth therefore fruits worthy of repentance, and begin not to say within yourselves, We have Abraham to our father: for I say unto you, That God is able of these stones to raise up children unto Abraham. (Luke 3:8)

Repentance that does not go that far is a joke to God. We may pride ourselves of being so devoted to God yet demonstrate a different thing in our hearts.

Do you still take money from the adulterous spouse you have been sleeping around with even after repenting? You may be using one excuse or the other to refuse to have sex with them but as long as you have not conclusively let them go you are still tied to the sin. David was legally married to Bathsheba but that did not deal with the sin. You might start lying that today you have periods, the next you have assignments, the other that you must visit your parents. But it all boils down to this. You are not willing to cut the tree that provides the forbidden fruit. You might weep all you can. You might go to prayer centres for weeks. You may fast for months. But as long as you are not letting go of the sin you can never expect God to separate it from you. And nowadays it is not only women who do that. I was told these days there are male prostitutes.

What do you about the rent and other expenses that have been coming from that source? Tell me whether the fruits of wickedness are worth all the pain you are going through. Is that car you are driving because you slept with your boss worth the condemnation you are living with? Is that house you acquired fraudulently worth the guilt that plagues you?

Maybe you experience some thrill when your flimsy dressing leaves men ogling after you. You know it is fodder for lust and you feel great when all men and even women turn their eyes in your direction as you pass. God has convicted you of being the pathway of sin and you are feeling so sorry for your sin. Crying night after night will not provide the release from God. Even going along pulling the dresses down to cover the essentials and up to cover the breasts will not deal with your sin.

I know some are saying that those are the only clothes they have and I agree with you. But do you think it is repentance when you are a walking temptation everywhere you go? Is that reason enough to refuse to deal with it?

And whosoever shall offend one of these little ones that believe in me, it is better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and he were cast into the sea.  And if thy hand offend thee, cut it off: it is better for thee to enter into life maimed, than having two hands to go into hell, into the fire that never shall be quenched: (Mark 9: 42, 43)

It is better to have one or two appropriate dresses than to have a full wardrobe that drives you to hell because you are causing God’s people to stumble.

Maybe you bribed to get the job and are wondering why no amount of repentance is giving you peace. Face the music. It might mean going to jail for that release. But I am sure God will give you the right cause of action when you agree that you will do what it takes to get rid of that sin.

Balaam (Numbers 23 – 25) for me is the epitome of the kind of repentance we should cringe from. At least three times we see him being refused permission to curse Israel. Yet he remains focused on the reward he was promised. Even the talking donkey was not sufficient enough to turn him from his folly. We see him dying the death of the ungodly just because his repentance did not go far enough. I have addressed his case on my blog (Balaam and Politically Correct Answers)

What is it has God been speaking to you about? What has taken peace from you yet you remain in a constant state of repentance? Could it be that your repentance is only mouth deep? Is there something you are refusing to do because you feel the price might be too high? Are you wondering why repentance is not giving you the release you hear and read about? Could it be that there is some drastic action you have been deferring because you feel God should understand the genuineness of your heart?

Well, now is the time to face it. God will never forgive a sin that has not been repented and forsaken. Those sins will continue to cling to your person and may eventually take you to your grave and eventually hell.

Do a radical thing. Cut them off. Face the music. Pay the cost.

Maybe you are a preacher who is tired of his sermons because they have stopped challenging people towards godliness. People have stopped being convicted of their sins, even ones who are openly living in sin. However hard you try you can’t see any change in your congregation in God’s direction. You wonder why you are experiencing frustration instead of fatigue that you dealt with when your ministry was bearing fruit.

At the back of your mind you know that you have friends that have contributed to that. You know that you have supporters that have taken your ministry to such great heights who have slowly and surely taken your sermons from what they should be to what these friends and supporters feel comfortable with. Probably it is none of that but you have defenders who have fought for you even when the whole church leadership was against you. You know you remain there because of the sacrifice of these fighters who could even sin to protect you.

Maybe it is friends who have made the church get you things even against its structures. They wield such great influence that you know they have even twisted scripture to get you what you have from the congregation. They have made you the absolute ruler of the institution though you wisely say it belongs to Christ. How can you offend them?

You have also been in deep reflection, even weeping night and day to see the light in your pastoral/ ministerial tunnel. You have repented about your worthless sermons that are more entertaining than life changing. You feel pain when people applaud you because you know that God is angry with those sermons because they do not lead people to Him. You have tried all you could to change but all in vain because you are indebted to these people who have sacrificed so much to keep you in comfort.

Complete your repentance. Cut all those links off. It might cost you that car you are driving but it will take the sins far from you. It might even cost the house your family is staying in but it is better to live in the slums with God’s favor than in a palace without. It might mean taking your children out of those schools to cheaper ones. It might cause great fights with your wife and she might even opt off your life because she had adjusted well with that lifestyle.

And every one that hath forsaken houses, or brethren, or sisters, or father, or mother, or wife, or children, or lands, for my name's sake, shall receive an hundredfold, and shall inherit everlasting life. (Matthew 19:29)

Take your pick. Choose between being right with God and being at peace with everybody and everything else. But it is not repentance if it stops short of cutting links with everything that has contributed to the sin. No wonder Christ talks about plucking off the eye, chopping off the hand and leg, etc. Nothing is worth my losing God’s acceptance. Nothing should delay God taking my sins as far as the west is to the east from me.

Probably it is in marriage or relationships. You found grass a little too green on the other side to leave alone.  Or you found your biological calendar going too fast for your comfort and decided that a bird in hand is worth the two in the promise. Now you are stuck in a relationship that is spiritually too stale for your liking. No crying in repentance is doing anything to spice your spiritual appetite. Outwardly you have more than anyone would need. You have good spouse, adorable children, great job, great connections and excellent returns for your investments. Yet you feel as empty as an unoccupied grave and just as dead.  You wonder how foolish you could have been to take a short cut to access what God had promised.

In the past you used to wonder as you read Ezra 10 how Judah could have been so callous to rid themselves of wives and their children. But now you examine your life and can understand from your own experience why that was essential. You have already paid a huge price for that short cut. What to do? Surely you can’t go the Ezra way? Surely you can’t cut all those beneficial connections as they are not really sin? What about the marriage that is outwardly a model for most that at times you are the subject in sermons on good marriages?

Deep down you know that you are like the church in Sardis (Revelation 3:1). Everybody sees you as full of life yet you know you are as dead as death itself. That is tearing your spirit apart. You weep and repent day and night but are not feeling anywhere close to your breakthrough.

Which eye needs to be plucked out? Which hand or leg needs to be chopped off? You must realize that there are no short cuts as far as God’s standards are concerned. There are no short cuts where repentance is concerned.

Will you take the plunge?

God bless you.

(These are just a few scenarios we go through. Seek God’s take as it concerns your life. Pray like David)

Search me, O God, and know my heart: try me, and know my thoughts:  And see if there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting. (Psalm 139:23, 24)